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| Confucius, proponent of social harmony |
I am utterly confident that all subscribers will emphatically disregard the recent, slanderous rumors that Sam Soundar has a wildly successful musical career under the alter-ego of Adam Levine. I had never heard of the man, but apparently he performs as part of the musical group known as "Adam Levine and the Maroon 5".
I was able to get in contact with Matt Flynn, drummer of "Adam Levine and the Maroon 5", and in response to these dastardly rumors, he said, "Oh, surely not. I've never seen Sam Soundar and Adam Levine in the same room at the same time, but that's perfectly explained by Adam Levine always having to make some phone calls in private just before Sam visits us. Besides, Adam's and Sam's mannerisms are quite different, despite their oddly similar stories of their childhoods."
I also talked to to Julius Thalberg, who happens to be the legal counsel of both Sam Soundar and Adam Levine. He said, "Yes, my two clients are definitely two different people, rather than a dear friend engaging in a frenzied double-life to boldly pursue musical and engineering endeavors who employs me to safeguard his secret. I just can't stress enough how they are definitely not the same person. Why do you ask and what is your home address?"
See? It's settled. Case closed. 'Nuff said. All testimony and coincidences are perfectly compatible with the fact that Sam Soundar and Adam Levine are merely two people with oddly intertwined lives.
Word of the biweek: proponent
Definition: one who supports something; an advocate
Example sentence: Although Senator Steve was a reliable proponent for bold, progressive ideas, he felt a bit uneasy as he read the provisions of the "Let's Genetically Engineer Some Wolf-Shark Hybrids And Shoot Them Into Space To Intimidate Those Dang Communists Act", mostly due to concerns about cost to the taxpayer.
Your suspiciously cheerful newsletterer,
Jacob
